Contact

Contact forms are difficult things.  So FOLLOW THE FUCKING INSTRUCTIONS!

1 – GET TO THE MOTHER FUCKING POINT!  You blather on like a Gen Z sperg, you get charged more.
2 – If you are one of those “Andrew Tate” Hustler University cunt-lickers, fuck off, and do not email me about your gay ass “content editing services.”
3 – I RESPOND TO ALL E-MAILS.  If I don’t in 5 days, that means the contact form IS BEING CUNTY.  It’s CUNTY, because MICROSOFT IS CUNTY.  So use the alternative email located AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS SCREEN IF AND ONLY IF THE CONTACT FORM IS BEING CUNTY!

    Your Name (required)

    Your Email (required)

    Verify Email (required)

    Subject

    Your Message

    Asshole Consulting Waiver and General Release

    Please read this form carefully. This form constitutes a legal release, assumption of risk, waiver and covenant not to sue agreement. It is a limitation on your legal rights as a consumer of Asshole Consulting services. This form must be completed and signed prior to any consulting services will be provided.

    In consideration for services provided by Asshole Consulting, including its members, employees, officers and/or agents (“Asshole”), the sufficiency of which is acknowledged, I, “The Client” fully understand and agrees as follows:

    1. THE SERVICES PROVIDED BY ASSHOLE DO NOT REPLACE THE ADVICE FROM A QUALIFIED PROFESSIONAL The services provided by Asshole do not constitute medical, legal, or any other type of professional advice. Asshole is not, and does not hold itself out to be, a professional service provider nor can any opinion rendered take the place of professional advice.
    2. WAIVER AND GENERAL RELEASE AND COVENANT NOT TO SUE, FULLY RELEASE AND FOREVER DISCHARGE (i) I fully release and discharge Asshole from and against any and all causes of action, claims, or liabilities of any kind or character, whether known or unknown, in connection with, arising out of, or in any way related to my use of Asshole’s services in longevity or otherwise, which hereinafter may accrue against it and which in any way arise as a result of my participation in consulting services, regardless of whether based on fault or negligence of Asshole; (ii) agree to indemnify, defend, and hold Asshole harmless from and against any and all losses, damages, costs, or expenses (including attorneys' fees and other costs of defense) which may arise in connection with my use of Asshole’s services; and (iii) agree to hold harmless Asshole and each of its respective direct and indirect subsidiaries, affiliates, partners and related entities;
    3. DISCLAIMER OF GUARANTEE Nothing in this waiver and nothing in the services provided shall be construed as a promise or guarantee about the outcome of any matter for which I have retained Asshole Consulting. Asshole Consulting makes no such guarantees. Any comments about the outcome of the matter and any advice given is an expression of opinion only.

    I ACKNOWLEDGE THAT I AM SIGNING THIS DOCUMENT OF MY OWN FREE WILL, WITH FULL KNOWLEDGE AND UNDERSTANDING OF THE CONTENTS HEREIN.

    I understand that checking this box constitutes a legal signature confirming that I acknowledge and agree to
    the above terms of this legal release, assumption of risk, waiver and covenant not to sue agreement.
    I Agree

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    Here is the back up email.  AGAIN, ONLY USE IT IF THE CONTACT FORM ABOVE ISN’T WORKING!
    AssholeConsulting@proton.me